excerpt from a letter to a friend i've yet to meet

i know that i'm not quite due for another message, but i've had an interesting couple of weeks, and i'm feeling introspective. so once again, you get to feel the brunt of the latest batch of considerations and ponderings.

today, in and of itself, was nothing out of the ordinary in the way of days and routine. i went to work, held two classes, met a friend for my one meal of the day, went to a second-run movie theater to see a comedy, came home, sat with my family while they ate dinner, had half of a half glass of wine (heartburn makes it difficult to consume much wine these days--it's truly depressing), played on the computer for about twenty minutes, then went to visit one of my good friends who lives down the street, where i talked, listened and got to watch part of a documentary about africa. i drank some delicious tea while visiting my friend and i think it had enough caffeine to make it difficult to sleep, easy to think a little more and type, so here we are.

just going through that list, though, and considering the significance of each part of my day, makes for a considerable amount of...analysis? which is why i'm interested in developing a creative nonfiction novella based on an average day. it's kind of like the ecotrip series that takes a closer look at something we consider common, to investigate its origin and consequence, its cause and effect, so to speak, on our reality(ies).

anyway--here's my breakdown, my interpretation, if you will, of this day.

my two classes:
i am responsible for teaching freshmen at a community college how to write. for you and i this is no task. the concept of a sentence, the building of a paragraph, and of multiple paragraphs that express trains of thought is second-nature. for these students, it is a feat to create a ten-sentence paragraph that is coherent, unified, and grammatically sound. we are at a point in the semester when the students are supposed to focus on the different kinds of development for paragraph construction: exemplification, compare and contrast, cause and effect, division-classification, argument, description, narration, and argument. each method is similar in that they all require a thesis or topic statement, a body that provides support for a central point, and some sort of conclusion that summarizes, reminding the reader of the original point. again--no great challenge for a person who has always been able to manipulate language. i give the kids time in class to complete certain parts of the writing process that they are taught. prewriting. drafting. proofreading and revision. so today students sat in a computer lab, using prompts from the textbook to begin working on the latest assignment, using one of three methods of development that we've recently discussed. although on a rational level, it made sense to keep lecture short and provide the class with time to compose, it felt cheap simply telling them to write. to use the period to type up their ideas, when so many of them are playing on facebook and using the time to procrastinate anyway. i get these papers that contain simple errors, and papers that contain little thought, but that demonstrate, on some level, that they are trying to follow the model prescribed. it's both daunting and frustrating to be responsible for something as simple as teaching people how to make a proper sentence. because aside from the conventional mechanics and rules that they're supposed to follow, which i see as superficial, i want them to become better thinkers. i want them to not be sheep merely training themselves to enter the workforce. i spend the first class overseeing their progress, grading papers while they type, ocassionally answering a questions or looking over someone's paper fresh from the printer in the corner of the room. the second class is more involved simply because it is small. tiny even, with only three of the six students in attendence. they too are working on the next assignment, due friday, and spend over an hour simply trying to put their ideas into paragraph form, after selecting one of six assignment options that i've only slightly modified from the text. that class soon ends as well, and i'm left with the rest of the day to do what i will.

after class, i'm starving. i took my thyroid medicine too late in the morning to have time to eat before class (because i have to wait a half hour before eating once i take it, and that half hour was just how long it took to get to work), and now that 3:15 has arrived, i'm cranky from hunger. my friend, fae, and i drive down the road to a small sandwich shop that mimics deli-style, mostly italian influenced, sandwiches. i order an eggplant parm sandwich with a side of coleslaw, and my friend gets mozzerella with tomatoes, roasted red peppers, basil, and olive oil, with a side of fries and a whole pickle. we sit at the only table in the shop and enjoy a fraction of the food before we're full. the woman who runs the place has pictures of her family, as well as sweet little notes from her kids, tacked to the wall near an open broiler. she is a nice lady, with bleached hair and tan skin, who is always kind and asks about my mom and sister, but who also has a couple t-shirts hanging in a corner that make a joke about how obama is going to ruin the country. as i leave, the woman asks me if my friend is gay, and i am half afraid to answer her, half insulted that she is asking. i say yes, and she proceeds to talk about the gay man that works next door at the hair salon, whom she adores. her apparent ability to avoid homophobia while embracing conservatism (in some form) intrigues me. she earns back points that i deducted upon seeing the shirt.

fae and i have visited the cheap movie theater a lot lately, so it seems natural to suggest we see a second-run movie. especially since i owe him money from the last flick we saw. so we go to see dinner for schmucks, which is nothing brilliant, but entertains nonetheless. while i'm laughing at the movie's dialogue and plot, i'm still secretly picking it apart. the comedic lead roles, the hyper-attractive french accented love interest of the main character, the portrayal of an artist character whose art is nothing more than a narcissistic exploration of his animalistic sexuality (intended to be ridiculous--is it making fun of art or simply the artist type?), the corporate characters who represent the american dream with expensive suits, fancy cars, and elaborate dinner parties held just for the sake of making fun of "morons" they meet. it was all very surreal, really, but with glimpses of the types of things that have infected and sickened our society to the point of stifling its true potential for progress. and there i was, buying into it, albeit at a discounted rate.

i see that this inspection is taking even longer than i've anticipated. and it's probably become quite boring. this is a shame, because i haven't even gotten to the conversation i had with my neighbor, parker, whom i've known for years, who is a father of two small children now, married, living in a cute house down the street from my mom's house. we started off talking about music, then racism, then technology, then globalization, then monopolization, and documentaries, and really spent a lot of time talking about our dependency on the things we've created, that not so long ago were not things we "needed" (like cell phones), and how much of what we have created has these terrible side-effects that we are only minutely aware of (because the companies profiting from them don't want us to stop needing them)...and it was all very fatalistic, but necessary. then we watched two excerpts from a series that this music producer did for the BBC about africa. i was immediately drawn to it because the subtitle was "the illuminated continent." i appreciated the reference to its historical opposite title "the dark continent" and all the implications of that name being imposed by an white, colonial presence. i've already learned so much from the two episodes i watched that i can't wait to watch the rest, and it is another one of those educational types of programs that i wish were just standard in classrooms across the country. i wish i had some way of fitting it into my own curriculum...because not enough people know.

and that is the challenge of education--taking the most recent of our understanding and sharing it with the masses. it takes so long for those paradigm shifts. knowledge, discovery, is initially so limited, so esoteric. and knowledge should not be like that. it should spread easily. it should be accessible. with the advent of the internet, there is so much more information that is more accessible. but porn is more popular than educational sites. at least i assume so. youtube, with its vast array of informative videos, has more hits for the funny stuff, for the fails, and the two girls with a cup, than for the video on understanding the tenth dimension.

so my thought of the day, the theme that seems to come of this analysis, is the same question i often ask myself, in all sorts of contexts: what is being communicated? considering the capacity we have for mass-communication, for broadcasting ourselves, our lives, our thoughts--what is it that we spend more time sending out to viewers and readers? what is it we share more than anything else? what is it we're texting and blogging and posting and airing? what is it we're watching and reading? i have answers to these questions, but they don't seem optimistic. they are tinged with cynicism, with realism, with facts and speculation based on patterns i see carried out in the actions of people everyday.

but i'm not pessimistic. because i wouldn't have come home and felt the need to write this had i denied the existence of possibility. and it is through the connections that i've created, or welcomed, with people like the friends i spent time with today, and with you, that keep me going. that remind me that there are people who are not sheep. who have surpassed the ignorance that would've restricted their ambitions and spirit alike.

and on that note, i hope this finds you well. i hope to hear from you soon, even if it is a fraction of this ridiculously long message.

peace.