the fluidity of identities

july 3, 2021

i've been reflecting on spectrums of identity, so 

many words to describe how we live and breathe.

i guess i always felt at home with people who were queer. and because queer folk have always been a part of my life, because i had people i could be myself with, i have experienced advantages that come with the love and security inherent with a positive environment/community. 

i had arrived at a more isolated way of living by the time i calmed down from the waves of hormones influencing my decisions. i am content with the assortment of friends who've claimed pages upon pages of the chapters of my life. and for me, since relationships are the point of being here, i already feel settled into a decent life, sense of purpose/meaning, being. 

it has taken me more time to accomplish certain physical tasks. certain emotional ones as well. but mentally, spiritually, i have not yearned. i have not felt unfulfilled. i am joyous and filled to the brim with love when my soul is at ease. i know how to recenter. i have a good grasp on how i work. i've spent time with my thoughts and feelings since i was younger, and the ongoing dialogue with facets of myself have supported an intimacy with myself that i'm proud of. i quite like how i've developed, and the older i get the less i care how well others recognize my magnificence, i just want to better radiate. share.

i encountered intersections within my own identity once i acknowledged that i was attracted to girls and boys. that was my introduction to the idea that there was an entire subcommunity of people within the larger population.